I have trouble letting go

Some days I want to hold on to every moment of the past. And there are days when I wish that all my bad experiences are wiped away. But, many of us just want the bad ones to go away. Why not the good memories?

It’s not easy to let go of the tiniest things in your life. We build everything around us piece by piece. A place you call home is what you make by putting your soul into a house. I learned this the hard way, every single time and every time it was hard.

How would you feel if you never had a permanent place and always kept moving to a new location every 4 years? This is a snapshot of most part of my childhood. I never had the same set of friends, I never went to the same school starting kindergarten and I’ve never been familiar with the concept of having a ‘childhood friend’. But, amidst all this, I experienced the biggest growing up lesson, which was to let the sand slip away from your palms. 

I wished I never had to leave each time I had to move. I wished I didn’t have to give my toys away and didn’t have to cope up with the other kids in the school. I wished that I never had to invest time to make new friends only to lose them along the way and then start the process again. I wished that I never had to buy bigger or smaller clothes because of my constant weight mismanagement. And because adulting can be hard for many, I wished I didn’t have to do that either.

This constant process of change may not seem big and you might want to consider the grander things like fate and destiny to be behind it after all. Wherever you go, whatever you do, every day you change and maybe it’s for the best. I’ve learned it the hard way that when you are not ready to let go of something you own, greater things will never happen. You’ll never see the brighter end of the tunnel until you decide to enter the tunnel in the first place.

If you ever think, you’re the only one, don’t worry yourself much into the overthinking. Let go and you’ll surely find the light in the darkest of times.


2 thoughts on “I have trouble letting go

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